Do you think they'll have a special part during the BET awards for Michael Jackson even though he turned white?
guy picked up a cops taser, thing shot him in the neck, he went down and pissed himself, cop started laughing and hasnt called an ambulance.
I just put anything in between my legs and hope for the best.
I can mark tailgating, going to the game and getting road head off my to do list today
I hope that he knows just because i pissed in his bed doesn't mean were together.
Before you ask, yes. Whatever you're wearing IS too slutty for his mom's funeral.
Can you call him, he said something about going to the balcony to pee and now hes texting me saying hes lost
She somehow inhaled a tack last night, she's having surgery today.
theres a turtle on the table. helping me eat my ramon noodles.
Do what your heart wants. . .
My heart wants to rip his balls off and tie therm to his head using his penis
Shrimp lo Mein doused in green apple Smirnoff is a rare delicacy only a few get to experience..guess I should consider myself lucky
He says I vaguely mumbled happy New year, kissed him, threw up and then went back to sleep.
I'm 2 beers deep on an empty stomach, and I just wanna say, I pride myself on my use of commas
He woke up to me masturbating during the presidential address. Now he won't stop making jokes.
I'm pretty sure he sprained my clit...
Randomize
