now i know why i became what i already was.
Standing here next to my mom talking to my friend trying to act like he doesn't sell me E every weekend.
Someone just asked me to go to the dining hall for dinner and he will use one of his swipes to pay for my meal. i think this is a college version of a date
i think i scared a bird with my dick
You need to find a way to go down on me and lick my toes at the same time
I'll google it
He kept screaming "it's so seductive" while he was humping the wall
i'm sick of coming in second next to bourbon.
Are you available to help carry me into the house Monday?
I never thought I would say this but I have to clean queso off my vibrator
Mystery solved: The table is broken because I had sex on it last night.
then you said,"Take this damn cabbage!" although it was actually your shirt. i found you in the elevator of his building.
he peed on his own floor last night after we left the bar. pretty much sums up how i feel about the evening
Well that's another check off the sexual bucketlist of things I never wanted to experience.
Some small part of me hopes I'm on the probationary list because of seeing the Dean at that fetish party.
I'm proud of you for choosing to be an organ donor on your fake!!
Randomize
