Smith looks like a guy that goes on a lot of first dates
dude u gotta turn down the techno when u bang that chick its creepy
We just all danced like dinosaurs in the center of the dance floor.
Just because we buy weed together doesn't mean were a couple
Just used your umbrella as a puke sheild. Thanks man.
I have glow sticks stuck to my boobs and a missed call from the 911. I'd say last night was a success.
The birthday girl is bringing her own barf bucket, it is going to be a good weekend.
I am not going to ask my mother to pause a movie so I can have phone sex.
Me focusing on not shitting my pants is keeping me awake.
This isn't just a hangover. I can feel the blood moving through my veins, and it hurts.
Is it normal that every guy I hook up with tells me my hair is sexy as it's happening? Like that can't be normal
He knocked me in the face with the phone during my light show. Didn't even feel it. Ecstasy is amazing
who knew magic tricks and sex would actually go together?
I never thought I could be this turned on by a man wearing racoon tails.
annnnd thats why you don't tip your waiter by flashing them
Randomize