I have fifteen cents in cash and 80 cents in the bank. BUT I have weed.
Thanks for putting the blue stuff in the toilet, it made me throwing up this morning more enjoyable.
Just hook me up with your dad already stop being selfish
You call it a hangover, I call it a baby squirrel burrowing its way out of my head.
i think i need to institute a "if your dick has been in my mouth this year i get a xmas present" policy
He said I act like a cross between a kindergartener and a high 70 year old man. Which is inacurate because it fails to account for the disco obsession.
I mean like if I stood up my head might pull me down like an anchor
It's not that I even wanna fuck these guys anymore, just cuddle that's all. My conscience has never been so proud.
Ya. My thumbs are those buffalo's, but my legs are spirits and my torso is that Indian guys and my head is the eagle
moms trying to set me up with a 28 year old. hes graduated university like im getting high in my bed and he's an adult
I've never had sex with me but I assume there are worse ways to be woken up.
I do not mind being torn from the first touches of sleep to see a man who looks like that
Yeah he drove 30 minutes at 3 AM to come fuck me in my neighbors treehouse
It just so happens all of their names are Ryan, so I never have to change whose name I moan.
I just saw puke on the road at the same stoplight i threw up at sunday morning! Makes me smile inside.
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