he literally just asked me which v neck he should wear tomorrow.
One reason I don't come to Portland. I saw 8 guys I have had sex with last night. At the same party.
By 8 I mean 9.
And by 9 I mean 10.
I just realized. my grades aren't ready for st patties day...
just saw someone in just a bathrobe not even tied shut run to the bathroom with a facefull of cum. Someone had a good night
I'm currently looking through google images of circumsized penises and realizing how vital pre-marital sex is.
Jesus christ it's been two texts and we are already talking about dildos
Going to the u of w I constantly have that moment of, oh hey I felt you up at that rave at folk fest that one time. Winnipeg is too small.
Strip clubs just aren't as fun when a man tries to drunkenly grind on you.
I tried to take home a cat on broadway last night. I named him Pinocchio and put my purse down on the sidewalk and tried to put it inside it
My wife climbed on top of me, fucked my brains out, and gave me money from the ATM. I'm living the dream.
I found my weird threshold when Truth or Dare became everyone get naked and snort Adderall off the kitchen counter.
Wake up. Eat bread. Find your dignity. Don't be late for work again.
I think clothing becomes optional at the second date! But you seem like a rule breaker
you never un-have a 4some
Next time you decide to post pictures of yourself in your underwear on facebook, please don't tag me as your bulge.. My mom spent 10 minutes looking for me in that picture. I had to tell her I was hiding.
Randomize
