You get to witness red pubes. I'm almost jealous. That's like my dream.
Fuck him. I'll set him on fire for you. Then we'll see how good of a firefighter he is.
Pretty certain he passed out for a while going down on me. Absolutely certain he passed out during the blow job.
There is a mirror in the headboard of the bed that I'm sleeping in so I can immediately question life choices when I wake up.
Omg. The nephews found my stripper pole. The scary part is theyre good at it.
The number of times I've puked in the Walgreens bathroom is becoming way too many for my pride.
Nothing like cleaning dried puke off your floor to make you feel like you've failed as an adult.
A gentleman never tells..... therefore i will neither confirm nor deny the attatched photos
Nvm, he just almost drank his drink from last night, his drink that has the condom in it. Kinda answers my question.
My taste buds are fucked up, everything tastes like fire after last night.
In the morning he said my plan to make 2 casseroles today was, "hot in a grandma sort of way," & I didn't think it was weird. THAT'S how hot he was.
Cookies and nudity, all you need in life
I stole $10 from the guy I hooked up with last night.Not sure why but it was definitely more satisfying.
Two old ladies openly mocked me this morning at drunk breakfast. Is it time to reevaluate my life choices?
honestly, you deserve someone taller anyways
Randomize
