Pride was great cause we really can now appreciate how far we've come as gay people!
Doll, if you're still fucking strangers behind the WeHo Sonic while high on E then we've come as far as 2003...
Sitting at a red light. Windows are down. I'm blasting Gaga's "Disco Stick" and doing an interpretive dance to it because I think I'm hilarious. Look to the left and see two Phi Delts that I know with their windows down. They are horrified. I am probably going to lose their Facebook friendships.
woke up in a garbage bag. literally. it was used as a sleeping bag.
Just waterfalled in the movie theatre... this is the beginning to a good night
I think its only fitting my first purchase with my student loan is a glass pipe? I think ill name it 'Subsidized'
The doctor said 'youre the 2nd youngest person that ive seen with this condition. Thats probably not the silver medal you were looking for today.'
it took me 20 minutes to get her upstairs... she crawled under a car and wouldn't come out.
Well no need to be a stranger, even if you aren't interested in joining my bisexual polygamist marriage. New city, new friends.
Can you come get Dustin he's putting taco bell fire sauce on cigarettes trying to light them again.
I just sneezed weed. Kinda wanna try to smoke it.
I learned so much about myself in that shower.
More importantly this is sex weather and i am striking out
I'm having post-experience "why didn't I fuck her in a public bathroom" regrets
I went in the hotel's jacuzzi fully clothed, threw up in the bathroom half an hour later and woke up naked next to Dr. Seuss' "Oh the Places You'll Go"
I've seen your dick too many times for both of us to be straight.
Randomize
