Moving to Utah. Got sick of alcohol and have a severe wife shortage.
Should I have kids to fix a relationship??
girls just need to accept the fact that i'm going to make out with their boyfriends
hearing that almost makes me feel good about peeing on the coffee table
Apparently we had sex last night, and then I made him drive me to the beach so I could puke in the ocean.
and then the other night his penis tricked us both into sex
she blew me in the men's room in the restaurant. it was a french bistro, so it was okay
She wasn't to happy when she went to put her shirt on and it was covered in cum I just looked at her and said collateral damage....
and let me tell you something, handcuffs are surprisingly uncomfortable when they arent being used in a sexual manner
I found your Halloween costume. I think you shit yourself last night
telling her she was ovary-acting wasn't the greatest idea. doing it in a text so she could see your spelling was where you really went wrong, though.
Just a warning... Flip, sip, or strip always ends in all participants being naked. Learning from experience.
She dressed up in a sexy maid outfit for me, but she got mad when I asked her to actually do some cleaning.
It has moved into the cliche "thin line between love and hate" real quick. With her. Not Taco Bell.
I blew him while the canoe was sinking...I think of it as the better version of the titanic
Randomize