I used to have a blog that was basically all about ****** and all of his sexual misadventures
I mean it made tucker max look like a fucking alterboy
But unfortunatley his mom did a google search and found it
dude wtf did we explode in my microwave last night?
idk but i think it had a face
I remember having a drink with vegetables in it. They said it was a mojito, but it tasted like cabbage.
haha i love mojitos
ya and i hate cabbage
two drunk chicks are talking to me about reinacting 2girls1cup
ill bring the camera dont start without me
and you wish you could be eating a cookie right now. but all you get to eat is a penis
Aw c'mon. You have to see if the spinning penis rumor is true.
Have invented new cocktail. Any flavor of crystal light and vodka. I call it "I am going to die alone"
You may have cured my horniness. I feel like my libido just got shat on by kittens who live on an enchanted rainbow.
It sounds like heaven mixed with world peace and orgasms. The acoustics in this car are awesome. Or it's the weed idk either way it's great
I'm sending you the three minute video I jus took,....it's of me eating a pear up close
It's disgusting. He breathes through his mouth and just sounds fat. Plus he chews all loud and shit.
He wore pink swim trunks on our date and repeatedly insulted my profession, but his cat kept standing up like a person to nuzzle my face and I felt like a Disney Princess. I hate this dude, but the cat is too amazing for me to not fake interest for.
That's a gentle way of saying I passed out like an 18-year-old on his first trip to Tijuana
She was cleaning herself at the bus stop. She also picked up gum off the ground and ate it
the good news is I finally used my captain america waffle maker to make captain america waffles
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