His mom took away his car and made him quit his job.
HE'S 26!!!
didn't have any spoons so I beer bonged my chicken noodle soup. I fucking love camping.
she won't take no for an answer... no matter what language i said it in
he aimed his bare ass at the sparkler, farted, and it really did work...i love 4th of july anal fire works
I just remember taking her cat for a walk around 3 am then falling asleep in a slide at the park
I should have but it might be too early in this fuckbuddyship to emasculate him
I'm considering failing out of my last semester of college just so I can keep fucking him.
I just took a shit with a lightsaber in my hand. Dreams fulfilled.
constantly striving to make life awkward and more complicated, one drunk bone at a time.
So the guy who is making our IDs is in jail now for attempted murder, with no bail...
So no fakes?
I feel a whole lot better than i did this morning at 3 when one of my roommates discovered me slightly aware of my surroundings and naked in the bath tub with the shower on
maby next time we don't finish the whole box wine just because it tastes like shit
Please don't place wagers on my sex life unless you are giving me a cut. With my current sluttiness I feel like I deserve 40% for how much money you'll make
Who put the meatball sub on my door handle?
Best neighbors ever! They found the guy ive been wanting as a booty call and got me invited to the party the guy was at and gave me alcohol so i could be tipsy when met him. im never moving.
i'm the most scandalous girl at stop and shop. i kinda have to fuck him in the meat cooler.
Randomize
