If that was your dad, he is hot
He's trying to wipe up all the spilled drinks with a banana
i can't believe i had a foursome before a threesome
ugh i can't even wear this perfume anymore. it just brings back blurry memories of blowjobs and regret.
well its a long story but basically i overcame many cockblocks
Wait, is this the kid that tried catching a bat in your backyard with a flashlight and a ball of tin foil?
I would convert to being a Republican and Mormon just to sleep with Romney's sons. The things I would to do them.
How do you feel?
Like the devil himself shit me out, baked me into a pie, ate the pie, and shit me out again.
So, I'm stoned at his house petting the neighbors cat I made him steal.
You're a fucking train wreck.
We found you wrapped up in a tarp in the garage the next morning, thats how real shit got.
We just got in a fight with grandma b/c she tried to tell us you didn't go hard.
I'm so high right now that I'm wearing gloves.
Sooooooo, maybe just fucked on a motorcycle.
she threw up on her exam, awkwardly wiped it off with her sleeve and continued writing.
I have only been here for a week and might contributed to a dumpster fire on accident.
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