Where are I am going home with Ryan
I don't know who this or Ryan is but it is probably too late to talk you out of it
I am sitting on my kitchen floor drunk with a bottle of jose cuervo, tryin to make cinnamon rolls and write a paper. I love college
there are so many fish in the see you have left to fuck
i tried slipping money on her dresser whenever she brings guys home hoping she'll start to question her goals in life... i think its only encouraging her
He came up there while i was bartending, ate a salad, told me he wanted to divorce me, then tipped me 10 dollars....
you are getting stockholm syndrome from your pubes
The fact that when I blacked in you were sober enough to kick me out of your roommates bed makes me question our friendship.
This teachers last name is pfister and she did the fisting motion to help explain how to pronounce her name. This class might be good
your body is your temple. do you really want a bunch of dicks in your temple?
I can't find a song to express how gay I'm feeling.
He woke me up, handed me a ringing phone and said break up w her for me. That hung over.
I just want to go home and eat bagel bites in my underwear
will a lunchtime blow job make it better?
I literally blew him under my face mask. Not because I thought it'd protect me from COVID, but because I wanted to prove to myself that I could.
Dude, I'm pretty sure I just drank iced tea last night and yet I'm still hungover. What the fuck is my body anymore ?
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