He lasted like 30 seconds. With a condom. I just expected more from the president of a frat.
I'm at the bass pro shop. They have a river full of trout and turtles, a shooting range, a full bar, and the patriots cheerleaders are here. I now understand why people are rednecks. I may never leave
Seriously man, I'm worried that my dick's going to fall off someday if I keep this up...
hes either a crazy bad problem or a crazy good orgasm. I just can't decide which one.
I decided they need a food cart that just roams around the library like the cotton candy people at the circus. But with real food. like tacos cause it sounds delicious.
You have to wear the princess leia gold bikini every Sunday
and then she started to quack like a duck and u started throwing bread at her
I was ashamed to still be in my green tank this morning, but there's a guy here in full on bright green pants and a green blazer. He looks like the lucky charms guy stretched out at drunker than usual. Now, I fade into the background.
Jail is not for me. They portion control your meals and I don't really like that.
I take Paypal, cash, sexual favors, and roasted red potatoes with garlic as payment. You choose.
YOU SLEPT WITH A GUY WHO HAS A BILLBOARD IN HIS HONOR?
i ate her out in full view of all her roomates. the word awkward doesnt even cover it.
Wine through a straw in a subway cup.....classy
Listen, i know this is weird for you, but as your fuck buddy, id prefer if you didnt fuck her.
Youre asking too much from me
Put the lady boner away. He's engaged. To my brother. No, life is not fair.
Randomize