I wish I could drop acid with the muppets
I dinstinctly remember making out to "I believe I can fly" and waving my arms like a bird to the beat.
You act like this is the first time i've fingered two 17 year olds at the same time
Your dad's facebook is ejaculating midlife crisis all over my minifeed
Is it cum slut, cumslut or cum-slut? Sexting, plz advise ASAP
I'll report later on the progress of the mountain orgy
...Saturday night. Get your dick ready. We are going to go nuts. I want to have sex fucking everywhere.
They installed a lotion dispenser in the bathroom at work... its like they want me to masturbate on the clock...
New rule for Thursdays: no high gymnastics
He's sweet and rough. A wonderful contradiction. He's the starburst of sex.
When you're a bigshot ER surgeon and I'm a starving artist, I want you to remember who held your hair last night.
It was a shot marathon. It only ended because we werent drinking in our house apparently we walked into the nieghbors. When they got home thy were soooooo pissed.
I told my coworker that I'm going to a dinner party and was asked to bring wine and pregnancy tests and he was like.. I miss being 20
You said the best orgasm you ever had, you gave to yourself. your boyfriend looked really disappointed. so did half the room.
On this version of “Dean Can’t Be a Normal Fucking Human,” I told a guy I’d shove a tv up his ass. Recreationally.
Plasma, LED or OLED?
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