therell be strippers and coke right?
no strippers. just coke.
i hate this fuckin recession
I wonder if she thought to herself "I'm gonna sleep with that guy tonight" when she watched me puke on the bar at 3 in the afternoon?
she demanded that I make her breakfast too so im in the bathroom cooking bacon with her straightener
Just disregard the tooth in the plastic bag in the fridge.
How are ur friends?
One is peeing in the grass and the other is asleep under the stairs. Fuck them I'm sleeping in the car
todays sighting is titled: Bum taking pictures with an invisible camera.
He doesn't care. He wouldn't care if my vag grew arms and smacked him in the face.
Mark just took 50mg Viagra. Tonight should be interesting for the neighbors.
Lets both be adults and never talk about last night again.
apparently I stole your wolf lighter. probably bc you made me howl while you puked over your deck railing.
It takes a special friend to go vibrator shopping with
Yes. It does.
at first i said "no rollerblading if I'm going to be drunk," but we all know how that went
So. Um. Hypothetically speaking...how would one get a squirrel out of the house?
Thanks for not letting me choke to death on my vomit last night
Thank you for attempting to organize my DVDs in chronological and alphbetical order
Right. Cuz nothing screams "You made it!" quite like selling your used underwear to strangers you met on the internet.
Randomize
