Good news! Whoever used this stall at Target earlier...not pregnant!
I DON'T KNOW WHERE WE ARE WE ARE TOO FUCKING ELEVATED.
Me either! Fuck yeah, 12th and something. 12th and hamburger stand.
Vanillla milkshakes are the new Gold Bond. Will explain later.
Wtf. Who made this Big Mac, Helen Keller?
Thats cool. we found a cat INSIDE a coke machine.
Anywhere you can eat green eggs and ham, you can have sex.
i just opened up my bathroom cabinet to get deodorant and found 4 bottles of natty. Its like the world wants me to miss this interview
I just took my friends on a tour of all the places I've had sex in my house. I dont know if that's more slutty, or the fact that it took 2 hours to complete..
I don't know at least half of his name. I have officially become a statistic.
grown man stumbling drunk down green street wearing nothing but a hot dog costume and crying. its not even noon yet.
just gonna show up naked this time. that way i dont have to worry about finding my clothes tomorrow
Tonight I plan on passing out fully clothed on the table. I don't know where normal people plan on sleeping.
WTF ARE YOU DOING IT'S FUCKING VEGAN COFFEE IT'S MADE WITH NUT MILK YOU'RE NOT A FUCKING SQUIRREL.
I woke up at 6:30 in the morning on the A train on 14th street. You wouldn't know anything about that right?
i came so much i feel like i were to try again, only dust would come out. and maybe glitter
Randomize
