Since when does wearing a condom and going down on me make someone a gentlemen?
There are at least 3.6 billion human cocks in this world. Get some. Get as many as humanly possible. Literally. Do it. 1-2-3 go!
Ive consumed more rum studying for law school finals than I did that time I fucked that fat chick in the back of VW Beetle. It's all ugly, but for different reasons.
I saw pigeons eating ur dried up puke today. Last night was fucking great
He left in the middle of the night, he left his shoes behind and stole my doc martens..size 6 female. Wtf?
Where were you last night, and why am I not surprised that drag queens were involved?
He said "you speak American pretty good for a Canadian" and it took everything in me to still fuck him. Dry spell ended btw
he'll always be the guy that i fucked on the bathroom floor
Had a dream I cut my own dick off. That's it I gotta see a doctor...
Umm
Exactly.
I slept awesome next to you. You're like an electric blanket that I can have morning sex with.
He may be engaged to someone else, but god damn that was the best 3 hours I've ever spent naked with someone.
I know. His dick was small at the top and got bigger at the bottom, like a fucking curling wand.
Did I literally just offer a blowjob for help moving? Yes. Yes, I did.
GOD DAMN IT I COULD HAVE HAD A MOTHERFUCKING 3 WAY LAST NIGHT. WHY BOOZE, WHY?!
What's the weirdest place you've ever had sex?
I don't think you're psychologically prepared for this conversation.
Randomize
