sorry probably not gonna make it :( kinda tied up right now
sad face, r u gay?... wait like really tied up?
:)
Yea...but the guy who is beating me has a ponytail. So actually, I'm the winner here.
Outside the community dumpsters: beer bottles and a carton of orange juice. Looks like we were here.
He was singing Will Smith Just the Two of Us to his burrito. That high.
Fuck him tonight for the both of us. We're still tag-teaming in spirit.
They were lying down in the parking garage pretending to be speed bumps...
I puked all over his apartment, then slept with the skinniest girl here. Which isn't saying much in Ohio.
He's going to regret telling me he doesn't care if i shave or not...
I'm sorry i ruined our friendship with a boner
Yes he was puking but in the only light of the whole parking lot and he was resting in the patch of clovers and he just was a garden fairy
I'm dealing with this like an adult, cupcakes and beer.
The less money I spend on drugs, the happier my mom will be.
There was a time I was reining queen of Sunday funday... And at that same time I also weighed 20 pounds more, had the morale of a spearmint rhino stripper, and woke up most mornings asking more questions than fucking Barbara Walters. I think I just wrote my own epitaph.
Literally just inhaled three cinnamon rolls. Sara is staring. It was inhuman
Just remember, the Browns have more wins than Ronda Rousey this year.
Randomize
