god, you should never be in the FBI. you'd give away america's secrets to any boy who asked.
You know your in college when you use the receipt from the liquor store as a bookmark
I heard from multiple reliable sources that she doesn't have a gag reflex. Of course I'm going to try to go home with her.
we got hammered off table wine and i ended up biting my acrylic nail off so i could finger his butt.. ill never look at valentines day the same
what is it with giant penises always finding me
the easter KEGG...out of a drunken typo there arose a new and spectacular holiday tradition
I liked a picture of him with his pants around his ankles, if that doesn't say I'm into you, I don't know what does.
So the dude who sold me my english book is the same guy who let me punch him in the face in exchange for a cig at a party a few weeks ago. small world huh ?
If you got tons of KY ads on HuluPlus, it's because I hit "relevant" every time.
Did you take the bag w/your drugs & cookie cutter?
she has that "i will punish you like your mom did" vibe, i think guys like that.
I just opened a beer with a child's toy at a 5 year olds birthday....can you look up the next AA meeting?!!
Why didn't we pregame for this?
Because it's breakfast!?!
You're having marijuana delivered to you. You're buying drugs and you aren't even leaving the house. I'm sure he'll be surprised if you're NOT wearing a bathrobe.
We get up to three toppings. Dignity is not one of them.
Randomize
