Do u think she knows her nickname is the oompa loompa
Why do I always give away anal sex as birthday presents?
Shut up... one mans birthday cake is another mans sodomy my friend
My dora the explorer band aid does not cover up the shame i feel right now
Some ambulance just rolled up to this bar and this girl just hops out of the back and walks inside
We're playing a drinking game to 'how to train your dragon'. has it really come to this?
Under someone's bed. Not sure whose. I think they're sleeping in it.
There is a large, jolly black gentleman in the parking lot of my appartment complex yelling about 5am jelly doughnuts. I want to be where he's at.
You'd be amazed at how difficult it is to find pics of the helicopter dick
I am very proud of your internet skills
but I'll probably watch some porn later so it's not a complete waste of a Saturday night.
there's no way I could forget finding someone else's hand in my pants
well they never fully had sex so she's like an eskimo step-sister. I'll make a family tree for you.
No. 70% of the female population would find them attractive. The other 30% are lesbian and even they would appreciate them for their strong bodies and athletic capabilities.
In honor of Super Tuesday, we should have the sex tonight.
I think I’ve reached sophomore-year-level of bad ideas
and you know that’s the highest possible level because it’s when I met you
the bastard is cheating on me with some sleazy barista from Starbucks
That’s his wife they’re back together
You say potato, I say sleazy barista
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