i'm making a list of conversation topics in my blackberry so the ride won't be so awkward
Drunkenly found an error on my bar tab last night. THANK YOU ACCOUNTING.
the beat of "birthday sex" is shockingly similar to my dry heaving rhythm. it's making me nauseous all over again.
She told me I had to leave by four. We fucked until six thirty and we are the champions played on the way home. Yeah god knew
the fact that my dorm room overlooks a children's daycare is enough initiative for me to have safe sex.
Guy in our group took down a chick in a wheelchair last night.
We're not on Beacon Street anymore so now your argument about not peeing on the sidewalk holds no water. Whereas my bladder has holded every water.
Besides the kids on acid... I was the highest kid there
Well pulled into the driveway, and there she was. Kinda like a Vegas version of the mint on a pillow
Just text the random number in my iphone notes that was entered at 1am. Should be interesting.
I was figuring I'd break up with her after work, but before Taco Tuesday
Summers almost over and we haven't golfed, got naked or had sex yet. Let's do all three in one day, no particular order.
Also I ordered a dildo and I'm not sure if I want it still, so there might be a free dildo in your future
He was passed out, face in the toilet, so I just pissed on his head. Serves him right
a reward? ill think of something
if its not drugs or food I swear to god ill throw a fit
Randomize
