you wouldn't even come home last night... Dead to me
How do i ask the guy i made out with for 4 hours if he is gay? He keeps telling me i'm so adorable and that he had a ''blasty''
My gyno told me the birth control she prescribed reduces sex drive
wats the point then?
my grandma just put on bowling shoes, to play wii bowling.
I'm in the library if you wanna come give me library head.
there has got to be a maximum amount of semen a person can take in before they get some kind of poisoning.
Come over. I'll eat you out and we'll make bacon.
best text I've received ever.
its before 9am and ive already had to dip my dick and balls in a glass of milk. probably isnt a good sign for how today is going to go.
Yea no bueno and I only brought enough weed to last one night. And it was no Hanukah nug, it didn't last 8 days.
i knew it was love when she pulled a beer out from between her boobs and offered it to me
Her text was so long it had an arrow to expand it. You know it's bad when even your iPhone can't handle her
I just want to have sex and eat dumplings. Is that so much to ask?
The stall at this bar had mirrors all around. I just looked at myself take a shit from like 3 different angles
I don't think I used nearly enough fucks in my reply to convey the level of fuck him.
Are you coming over for scrambled eggs and hand jobs?
Randomize
