so i had a choice between studying for my physics test on fluid dynamics or spend the night with my girlfriend. hello doubletasking.
You should never have let annie watch you have sex with other women
Drunk lesbians having an argument about their realationship isn't as hot as I imagined.....
Harry Potter. Singing. Sobering up. In that order.
You were chewing up hot dogs and spitting them out
He has horses apparently. I wonder if we could fuck while riding a horse or if that's too dangerous.
Alas, very true. I'll sell some of my eggs and give you like 10%
And with my 90% I'll get a scooter with a sidecar. And a pony. Also with sidecar.
Before we rave about the healing powers of your penis, remember it nearly killed me as well.
I ate you ate to the whole david gray album
If I never see my landlord's dick again, it'll be too soon.
If I woke up in a pillar of smoke I suppose that's a sign right
You slept on a pillow of digiorno
So you were shitfaced and stole a fucking kayak?
I'm gonna go take a shower so I can cleanly change into my drinking underwear.
THREE MINUTES! THREE MINUTES PAST MIDNIGHT I STSRT HEARING CHRISTMAS MUSIC ON THE OVERHEAD PA SYSTEM!!!
Randomize
