just so you know, your brother isn't driving home wasted tonight. he is, instead, in my dorm shower screaming about rubbing his butt with my loofah; thought you would be proud
I wish my dick could take responsibilities for his own actions
and i think we compared dick sizes, then high fived...
he just made me do "this little piggy" to his toes.
You yelled "GET TO DA CHOPPA" and burst through her screen door and disappeared into the night. With the goose.
Also, we accidentally donated a bong to goodwill
She gets me. First thing she said this morning "I'll buy breakfast if you can tell me my name."
Get here, there are important joints to be smoked and pies to be eaten
I'm beginning to worry that I seem to get along best with people when I'm naked with them.
I can already feel the hangover I'll be having on New Year's Day. I don't know if I'm prepared for this.
We fucked to Bonnie Tyler in my car. He's the one.
ARE YOU OKAY?
Physically? Yes. Morally? No.
my mom walked in on me eating her out, and i can never kiss my mother again.
I’m not washing my pussy with handsoap.
Bud light made chelada as a breakfast for those of us with class at 8 am
Randomize
