did it hurt when the cum got in your eye
not so much hurt, more like a stinging sinsation like mouthwash
What wine goes with Cap'n Crunch?
you wrote "5 million dollars" in the tip line for the pizza delivery man and insisted that he deserves it
Need a ride. Apparently screaming about the bartender's erectile dysfunction gets you kicked out.
He just kept telling me how to do certain things. It was like I was fucking my sex ed teacher
I can feel the alcohol in my calves
My roommate says its rare that you can be tear gassed before you lose your virginity so i feel accomplished in life
I just brushed my teeth. In the car. With watered down Sprite. From Saturday. Multi-tasking at its finest.
My unemployment came through so I'd like to thank the taxpayers of Utah in advance for my level of intoxication this weekend
I screamed "I want dick!" in the middle of the intersection. So many hot guys. I wish you were here.
its like my brain is a tree and you are those little cookie elves
Ugh, once again I had to block the view of him peeing off the hotel bar balcony, I earned those free drinks!
Never let your siblings swipe right.
test was negative. but nancy drew has yet to solve the case of the missing period.
Right after i got done cumming i sat back and gave a big Ric Flair "WOOOOOO!"
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