High enough to fry lime slices.....tasted like shit, by the way
You ever get that 6th sense feeling in your dick like you know its gonna get sucked later?
I woke up to an email from Groupon for 3 laser lipo treatments...on Valentine's Day...way to kick me when I'm down Groupon.
I am at the point where deciding not to drink alone is worth a rocky music montage in and of itself.
Btw. Made out with a random kid at a frat. It's all good though. He invited us to his frat party tomorrow so yay! For having plans!
It's gotten to the point that the dirty talk in my head when I touch myself has your accent
Just had the moment before I realised I'd packed you off in an ambulance last night after funnel-feeding you Monster and vodka. Your mom thinks I'm a dick doesn't she?
the scent of your tears make me crave pizza
just peed in rthe mens room but seranaeded them with adelle the whole timee so they didnt mind
The dopest dose you'll ever dose. I felt like an octopus all of thursday
It's supposed to be a shit show, it's an end of the world party.
I thought he was foreign, but it turns out when you're that drunk, an Ohio accent just sounds Russian.
Appearently I went across the hall last night demanding to ride my neighbors moose... How much did I drink?
I still blew him because I won't let allergies keep me from doing what I want. But I almost suffocated like 10 times.
I already popped my bottle of Rose and took my boxers off. No can do muchacho
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