Whore.
I was being facetious
Don't try to hide behind big words.
the semester is winding down: time to procrastinate by googling cheap keg options
I need to remember that good judgment goes out the window after the 7th shot and the 3rd Lady GaGa song.
She's like my safety school. At the end of the night, if I haven't found anyone better to hook up with, I can always call her if I need a place to drop a load and don't want to rub one out myself. Perfect next door neighbor.
That girl is nothing but trouble. She's 40% red hair and 60% daddy issues.
You know where a good place to spend summer is? In your head. High as shit. It doesn't matter where you are.
The bald guy bought me a shot so I chugged it and then walked out to the middle of the dance floor and told an old woman that might be your moms twin to bend it over...We didn't end on a good note though. Dude she stepped on my vans.
What!? It's 7:30am on gameday. This keg is not going to drink itself.
I have so many plans for this weekend and sobriety is not invited.
Just an FYI i'm going to get drunk as shit while you are on duty and attempt to not fall into the bathtub again.
Rodger that.
I'm definitely closer to having sex in every building on campus than I am to having a post-graduation career/plan/future. Unless that future is getting fucked in lots of buildings. I got that shit on lock down.
So I told him "To answer your question yes I am naked making pizza pops in your kitchen"
No alcohol sales on Election Day. WTF? Today, of all days, I need to be splurged to to vote for any of these morons running for president.
She's one of those people who could be either 16 or 23. In which case she's too old for me or in dangerously jailbait territory for you, bro.
Uess honpr I rememebrt hEzS cuter
You'll have to translate that into sober in the morning.
Randomize
