do you think there was ever a doctor who smelled his finger after giving a prostate exam?
The amount of 12yr olds downtown right now boggles the mind. I can thank taylor swift for a glimpse at my future 3rd wife.
I understand that I gave you a nose bleed with a cheeto last night and for that I apologize
he let me wear his jacket and there was a magnum and a bowl in his pocket ... I think im in love
It was just like old times except for going to hangover throw up before waking my parents up to open presents. Merry Christmas!
Omg it was awesome. At one point she says "cum in me, I'm too old to get pregnant".
Ok not good, my info has definitely been submitted to this sugar daddy website before.
This hangover is so bad, we are pregaming Chinese food with pizza.
Hey. There is naked girl with "plz don't touch her. She just turned 21" sharpied on her chest. What happened last night?
Some poor guy found you passed out in a bathroom stall. Again with your dick out. Looks like you got to rage after all.
I just had a flashback to the three of us in the bed and me shouting AM I THE BIGGEST OR LITTLEST SPOON?!
You sprinted into the side of a parked car
Man I can't wait till Thursday if strippers and beer are what you consider "research"
We sat at the bar and made fun of everyone around us. I'm in love
will you help me invent vagina-safe pop rocks?
Randomize
