you would have Pina Colada flavored saliva.
The drunken tricycle race really added some class to the Tour de Franzia. Until everyone wiped out and started puking.
We've shared an experience, my friend. I, too, have talked on the phone with a parent while giving a handjob
i'm too drunk to leave my room. poked my head out like a turtle and everyone knew i wasn't sober. i like it better in my nonjudgmental turtle shell anyway.
I ate her out for so long I might actually shit a vagina
In the bath trying to absorb water through my skin because I can't drink it.. That hungover
Also I'm proud of us for having an educational conversation in this group text.
Just went to my first strip club and they had Fox News on. Conservative booty time.
He passed out. I tried to set his chest hair on fire.
Do you think I need to report to HR that the intern and I had butt sex?
I just kept thinking.. Holy shit. We're fucking in my front yard.
He pretended his dick was a samurai sword and that he was slaying me with it is it bad I still wanted him to fuck me
I accidentally mass texted his dick pic. Not only to my friends, but to my dad as well...
Because talking after sexting is equivalent to cuddling after sex
I think sunday funday got a little out of control. There is cheese slices and BBQ sauce all over the roof and 4 empty bottles of vodka in my room.
Randomize
