Wow that girl who lives a couple houses down is going out wearing butterfly wings a skirt and fishnets
Don't judge me. Haven't eaten all day so I'm in my room sticking my finger in peanut butter, then jam, then my mouth.
It's like she bought one bad life decision and got one free
I need a creepy friend to scare off the other creepy people
I would be honored to be that friend.
over or under 1pm before my bracket is too blurry to read?
I'm taking her home. She just told a 90 yo woman in a packers hat to "suck her cock".
the best thing about long term relationship is that the fact that i bothered to shave my legs today counts as a valentines gift
Just once I'd like to do blow in a nice bathroom.
Beer acquired. Food is cooking
Wow, you are almost sliding into home plate for some stellar fellatio
I feel like he better crank it up to level RG IV tomorrow. It's the fucking playoffs.
Thanks for fucking me in last night
TUCKING. TUCKING ME IN LAST NIGHT
There is no sno cone on earth better than alone naked time. Side note: text when you all are headed home.
Believe me honey Imma fuck the discount out of at least one plastic surgeon in my life
He left a full handprint on my ass. He called it a "five-star review."
She walked up to me and whispered "I hope you're good at sex" and led me to the beach.
Randomize
