hooking up with chicks might be the way to go after all. walk of shame looks better in her clothes.
his status popped up and said 'probably going to jail.' it took everything i had not to press the like button
you said grace in the diner. 5am, drunk, grace. you thanked the man w the mushroom cut for the wonderful supply of screwdrivers
after taking her first shot and having her first random hook up she finally feels like she is ready for college
she has no idea
Honestly, It follows the same rules as Cock Roulette.
No. No. And hell no. If you are driving a Honda Fit you are not allowed to give me a dirty look. No.
I think I sprained my soul last night
Theme for your birthday? Beer olympics in S&M costumes? Sounds like a nice little saturday
maybe these stereotypes wouldn't come up if you would stop taking body shots off another
Tell me about it I woke up on your couch with only my underwear on and a 26 year old wrapped around me. I thought my thirties would be different.
What the hell happened to my hand?
Well, you got in a fight with a cabbie while jaywalking, but we got you to walk away. The problem was 80 blocks away, when you punched a parked taxi for "running you over".
He came back with a Butterfinger and vibrator batteries. There's no refusing him now.
Business idea: assless chaps for toddlers. I'm high.
don't worry, i'll dog sit again, the barking made the sex better, its like he was cheering for us, we were just THAT good.
You told me you didn't want to go to the hospital because you were drunk, but because you didn't want to leave the "fun".
Randomize
