ron's 8" boning knife is for sale. oh and it comes with a flavor injector.
High?
hahahahaha turkey breast
my little brother just asked me why i have handcuffs. How do I tell him that his sister likes being taken advantage of in the bedroom?
We're at that point in our relationship where sweatpants sex has become acceptable...
Lol I just left. He's funny and he's cute. Downside: he thinks he can outdrink us
You act like pregaming preseason hockey is a crime. Come on man, get fucked up and watch pucks. It rhymes so well it has to go together. DOS EQUIS Y DEVILS!
I think you begin to realize how unfair life really is when you're high and you discover that the new box of fruit by the foot on your shelf is actually empty
he told me while inside me and mid thrust that he's dreamed of that moment since high school... awkward
I just ASL-ed someone for the first time since 2002.
Sometimes I actually rage on Tuesday, come back, and do homework drunk and pull an all nighter.
You don't understand. There's baclava and there's post sex baclava. You can't compare the two.
I've started drunk signing up for 5ks. Who even does that?
I mean, I would have, but I couldn't come up with a logical reason to bring up oral sex during an orientation.
Every time I'm hungover I just want to watch Harry Potter and cry.
Well, we 69'd in the Jacuzzi. If that tells you the kind of night I had. Neither of us knew we could hold our breath that long. Deff. Most. Dangerous. Sex. Ever.
Just laying in bed, snuggling my cat, and pondering whether I'd like to attend a swingers party this evening...
Randomize
