You know, sometimes I seriously doubt your commitment to sparkle motion.
I could have mohawked her pubes.
its mom's weekend..did we need to couger proof the apt?
She is crazy, dude. She actually bit me on the gootch.
It's not even like I care. He was cute 30lbs ago and before he fucked that Michael Jackson look alike.
BABIES FOR EVERYONE. I'd be like Oprah except with babies
i did nothiing wrong other than not tell that kid his whole back was covered in puke
I can't be here...my therapist just watched me take tequila shots
thank you for extending my knowledge of the effects of vodka. speak of what happened last night and i will kill you and send your fingers to your loved ones.
Cool. Some 22 year old kids gave me a ride home from the bar last night. In related news, I made out with a 22yr old last night. He was adorable
I just had the worst experience of my life, my grandma found my condoms.
I reek of vagina.. My cab driver commented.
When you make me feel sane and well-adjusted, it is time to reevaluate your night out habits. Just sayin'.
STOP SENDING ME NAKED PICTURES WHEN I'M TRYING TO TEACH. MONDAY TUESDAY 1-3 IS A DICK AND ARSE FREE ZONE
This should be illegal
It is
I mean more illegal... I shouldn't have this
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