I just made a milkshake without a blender... thats determination
I feel wrong giving my mom a cash gift full of dirty stripper money.
they're both coked to the gills having a shouting match about the powers and abilities of godzilla. and using the wikipedia entry on the topic to support their respective arguments.
It's one of those mornings when I woke up thinking that i really shouldn't have hooked up with my ex boyfriend's girlfriend just to prove a point.
2 out of 3 people here lost their shoes. America.
You were throwing up and said, "Whipe my face, I must look presentable at all times."
Sweet. I'm actually coaching my work study into a 4-girl orgy so dinner was kinda important. Yes, I'm the best boss ever.
I told him I'd go cook him breakfast, but ended up passing out on the kitchen floor in the fetal position spooning the dog
Just so you know, a 6'7" tall gay man, with a martini in one hand and a fairy wand in the other, is not a force to be reckoned with...don't ask.
Dude, he threw a pool chair off of an 8 story building. It was a successful night I'd say.
No Bryan wants to get drunk, rub inappropriate dudes legs, talk about my vagina and send me pics of his boomerang dick. That's not how you watch basketball.
That's how he does EVERYTHING!
We got drunk and crashed a fifty year old woman's birthday party for the food. Whoops.
Well, I guess you are not meant to have this fucking picture of an adorable baby duck.
Nothing like a near-death experience to start off your Thanksgiving...
it wasnt that bad
you tried to climb into my fireplace while screaming TO DIAGON ALLEY! we didnt even watch harry potter. it was bad
Randomize
