id be glad to
Only in Montana can you find Septic Services that would display "Christian owned and operated" on the side of the truck. I'm oddly going to miss this state.
If i could tip my vagina, i would.
I felt like a body pillow being humped by a twelve year old.
duuuude. vodka popsicles DO NOT function.
We watched a biography of Frida Kahlo in class today. It was depressing. A chick with a UNIBROW just put my sex life to shame.
Please sleep at your girlfriend's tonight
Why?
'Cause I wanna jack off tonight.. And you being in the room makes things awkward
Dude. I legit missed class because I got too engrossed in the porn I was watching. Also I need to figure out how to get as flexible as these chicks. Some of the positions they do are outrageous.
Kellie accidentally ran into the car with two teenagers making out. made a big thud. there was a loud scream and she was gone...haven't seen her since
if a CSI technician examined our hotel room with a black light he'd think we hit the Pulse button a DNA blender without a lid
Finally finished unpacking shit from school n found a bra with no idea whose it is... I miss college so much it hurts sometimes
True I am eskimo brothers with every one of my room mates, but it was only two girls. And 9 outta 10 times I was first
I know you're here! I can hear your phoneeeee. Wake up and do illegal things with me.
Our faces when the strip club was closed looked like the grinch just stole Christmas ☹️
Dude, my back STILL hurts from carrying the team on BP last night.
Randomize
