Gayer than 8 guys blowing 9 guys
wow, that really makes you stop and think.
Fuck. sleeping in my sisters room again I heard zombie noises outside my window
what ever happened to devon sawa?
fuck...who knows?
i'm really worried about him.
my clit piercing makes the metal detector go off
oh my god. i just found my camera... on top of the bush outside of my house. never let me drink everclear again
It was literally me in an evening gown and him in a tux with six bottles of Vodka at Jons.
And this was for your brother's Christening?
I realized last night, I never talk dirty in German during sex. How much wasted potential is that?
So my roommate and I have a written agreement stating that if he tries to sleep with his ex girlfriend, I have to immediately intervene and nut punch him then send her on her way.
this is the most serious roommate agreement ever
I know. I feel like I should be doing mature responsible adult things though. Like getting loans, working 60 hours every week and not eating burritos in bed, ya know?
And I don't know if this is really ESP, or just a crazy feeling, but I'm pretty sure he has an std. Or at least a cold.
My doctor actually said I was suffering from an "acute hangover" in doctor's note I asked him for....what a douche
I've been with my family a total of 20 minutes and I'm ready to go on a bender. This is going to be a long weekend.
My god imagine how much cum is in that astroturf
I brought her cheeseburgers and tequila but she's still mad at me.
Finally got with the virgin.
Yeah? Howd that go?
As soon as I got it all the way in, I looked deep into her eyes and said "your soul is mine" in the deepest voice I could make. She was not amused.
Randomize
