Tickle wars 95% of the time end in sex.
Found a phone last night. Hope "daddy" gets picture messages
Was just grinding with my bio TA. She asked why i wasnt studying
My mom and I were trying to explain to my sister what an uncircumcised penis looks like. We had some minor disagreements.
Too long to explain. Basically I started an electircal fire. No one was hurt except for a box of cereal near the outlet.
We have 10 gallons of home brew. And james has an amazonian blow dart weapon that sticks in bags and the wall. Come over
She woke me up with an urgent call telling me she was rolling on Mollie and swimming in the ocean. I mean that's just great. If she drowns, I'll feel responsible.
I walking on her passed out on her bed, clutching a burrito and the walking dead dvd on replay.
Hit a new low. I'm FB stalking him while he is lying in bed sleeping naked next to me. He fell asleep with FB still open and unlocked on his iPad.
i sent my dealer a picture of the money i would pay him. i also told him i would pay him in cheez-its if he would prefer that.
I was just trying to be a good friend but in retrospect I probably shouldn't have pepper sprayed you.
I have his gate key so know he has to see me again.
I wonder how long it will take her to realize that I peed in her night stand.
I see myself subsisting on tequila for the next several days.
Fuck you bitch. You're married. You got a live-in dick at home for your needs. I still gotta surf this shitty town's bars for cock
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