It will be a surprise...all i can say is stripper clown
Damn it, I know in the morning I'm going to regret eating out of the trash...
Osama's death just kick started our Cinco de mayo celebration. Margaritas for anyone wearing red white and blue!
Stripper pole. Sore legs. More vaca money.
I created another version of Halloween, it's called swalloween, whatever girl in a slutty costume you bring home has to swallow or forever be known as the holiday grinch
Stole a wheelchair from the hospital and rolled down the street smoking and drinking this is my weekend
I still can't believe he came down from his hiding place in the tree voluntarily because he didn't want us to have to talk to the cops alone...
Wearing the 'Let's Party' thong feels weird without you...
I feel bad for his balls. Ive never seen so much sperm. He had to be dying
We split an eighth of shrooms and went ice fishing. It didn't get weird until I caught one and we both started crying.
There's glitter in my speakers, piles of cheezits on the floor, a random Audi in the driveway and a homeless dude napping in a lawn chair in the backyard. Wtf happened last night?
she told me she wanted to fuck me because i was "rugged". if the definition of rugged is a lack of manscaping, slightly overweight, and pounding 16 oz pbrs, then yes i am rugged as fuck
Appreciate the offer but I'm a huge fan of penis
Holy shit, we're married as fuck.
Soooo you're telling me you support us groom's men giving lap dances to willing patrons?
Randomize
