That's why Kanye is a gay fish.
what do people who dont have blackberrys do while they poop?
He cummed in my mouth, then said he had to go because his best friend broke his foot falling off of a balcony, put twenty dollars in my hand and was gone before I could even swallow...
One of my students just said I have "big mommy parts". Even third graders know that my tits are too big. God I love em.
I have no idea how to attract men with my personality anymore. He can't see my tits via facebook chat
I swear to god he's a one man village people.
all i wanted to do was something grown up. like go to applebees and drink.
There are not enough shots in the world for this. We walked in and they shouted "the pilgrims are here!" And then someone handed me a turkey leg the size of my arm.
Kayla got stiches in her face. Rode in an ambulance shotgun. Tried to steal a baby, thought it was mine
Currently doing my walk of shame down a floating dock. No more guys who live on a boat EVER AGAIN
This is why i like single justin better. my only regret is not being present for more of his short life. may he rest in peace
you're good to come back. The bouncer pulled me aside and told me. He also said you have nothing to worry about and that you have an awesome "upper punch" or some shit
I need you to know that everytime my toddler does the downward facing dog in the nude I think about the night you and your dude fell in love.
I'm getting a collar when he gets back in to town! That's like the bdsm equivalent of getting his class ring!
got cock blocked by the cops again. two of the cops were the same ones from that t bell incident and they recognized me... they still dont like me
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