you don't understand, he speaks spanish and is tall. i have to do him.
U shoulda just taken her to a stall and banged her and let me watch the game. Some friend u r.
Fell down a spiral staircase. Et tu vodka. Et tu.
I jumped on his cock in 2 seconds flat. Thanks mom for sending me to gymnastics when I was a kid.
GOOD NIGHT DREAM OF ALCOHOL SNO CONES
He's like Medusa, you can't look directly into his eyes or you'll turn into a slut.
Can we promise no matter what that we have sex the night the Mayan calendar runs out?
She said I looked exactly like my dad. Then she made out with me. Should I be questionable?
seeing two freshman taking a cab home at noon on a Monday makes me realize how much worse my life choices could have been
So I stappled myself into my toga... that should be interesting getting out of later tonight...
I'm just so happy. I go to sleep and when I wake up there will be chocolate milk and penis.
He is peeing inside and sticking up for himself. Those are two of the four signs of the apocalypse.
Some lady just walked up to me in the bar and proclaimed that I looked like a "shady motherfucker." Can't argue with that one.
I am naked in a blanket sprawled on my bed eating a pastry. This is all I want out of life. Ever.
Is it too early to start looking for freshmen penises to corrupt with our liquor and yoga pants?
I was just wondering the same thing! Gotta be any day now
Randomize