I'm going to an arts college, I live next to the frat houses, and my room number is 420. god has plans for me and I couldn't be happier.
The boys are giving me the exam answers and I don't even have to expose my body..yayy engineering!
Apparently getting drunk, buying a guitar from your local costco and walking in to an open mic night is not the same as rocking out to guitar hero...
omg. don't know how to spell his name, but hot new zealand guy's dick is magic
I miss the days when all my weekends consisted of were 69 and crunchwraps
i dont feel like going...you don't know how much work goes into getting my whore on
Kill yourself wednesday started off with a bang, and im pretty sure im still drunk from tequila tuesday.
I was naked with an australian flag taped to my boobs. Damn internationals think they can claim everything.
That was a $3000 rug we rolled him down the hill in.
Come over and play the Jeter 3000 drinking game. You drink if the commentators say "captain" or "3000". I'll drink if they say "overrated" or "past his prime".
Dude, I checked into a cathedral... I thought it was a joke, until I found a candle and a whole bunch of coins in my purse
S.O.S. he's talking about horses and breast feeding.
so we were doing it and I was like umm hi im losing my virginity can you take off your beanie
I may or may not have definitely said the words "how do I put this beer in my purse without looking like an alcoholic" last night.
I just started an apology with "so I'm sorry about throwing the Brita at your head last night..."
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