you dont know how to answer ppls txts anymore?!?
im sorry, i don't get text messages.
having sex with him was like banging macgyver. he did the most amazing shit with the simplest things
You told me when we were leaving the club if I could pin point your nipple through your padded bra you would show me if I was right.
The plan is to make enough mistakes this weekend to hold me over until spring break
He just invited me over to bang on a sunday afternoon. If I can make it top the time I went to a strip club on fathers day then I'll consider it a success.
My liver just had a heart attack.
Look, the fact that I didn't kick him out and rip your clothes off speaks very highly of me.
Yes, he did use his cock to direct traffic from my 3rd story window. That's why I love him
You know you've got awesome issues when the main deciding factor of whether or not to cut your nails depends on nacho consumption in the near future
Being a fine ass woman in a world full of fuckboys is the realest struggle I've ever known.
we're forecasting high levels of inebriation into the evening with dropping temperatures late at night
I just texted him from the other room to come have sex with me-stress relieved
You are such a millennial
sorry for the late response. was in jail for 6 months.
u would mumble something and then get unnecessarily loud and say random shit like 'id fuck the shit out of taylor hanson right now'
Idk, I know when I drink vodka my bi side comes out and I just want to make out with a girl
Randomize