I think it's safe to say that I made out with the entire msu campus this weekend
we went to a bar last night, drank beer in plastic cups. I took pics w/a random kid i pulled into a photobooth & i have easy mac in my purse. I belong here.
I know eh? If a man wants to pay 7 bucks to see some boobies he should be allowed to do so in peace.
I mostly enjoyed dancing with him because his boner was scratching my bug bites.
thanks for the bloody nose. you probably dont remember, i'm not mad.. only because your boobs are to blame
When one is stoned and browsing online dating profiles all men sound like serial killers.
I have way too big of a thanksgiving food baby to enjoy any of my old high school booty calls
i'm pretty sure i can feel a baby kicking just looking at him. if he didnt impregnate you, you officially have an iron-clad uterus.
the 5 D's of Dodgeball literally just saved my life
once he tried to wake me up from my hangover nap to have sex, that's when things went downhill. he had to go.
just once i'd like to actually BE there for your crazy drunk stories instead of just getting the play-by-play by people who can't remember half of it
Who knew that showing someone your boobs would make them stop crying.
I felt like I was selling my soul to satan but then I realized I already pawned it for drug money
I'm armed with nothing but $4 lip gloss gum and my phone. Ready to take on the fucking world.
the last thing i heard from her was "i wanna get fucked by a stranger" and i haven't seen her since
Randomize
