i was out of cigarettes so i took the butts out of the ashtray, emptied them out, and proceeded to roll one big Frankenstein cigarette.
It was the first time I had seen his penis when it wasnt hard. It just looked so vulnerable and a little bit depressed.
can't remember last night but the beers were $3.50, so i can count how many I had by counting my quarters
i can afford to take several trips up and down the parkway right now if I wasn't still hanging over my toilet
I passed out on the floor of a truck stop. Drinking binge 2011 is now over.
We fucked in your water heater closet. Told you we'd try everywhere.
Her face just looks like a massive mistake. That's the only legitimate description I can say about it
She showed up in lingerie and a turtle backpack full of bacardi. I think its love.
You left wolverine marks
I'm somewhere between sorry and proud
I'm running on jager fumes right now. It's like I put diesel in a prius and said fuck it.
He's sending me pics of Yellowstone scenery...the only thing I can think is "I would have sex next to that waterfall"
He's easy on the eyes, light on his feet, and rough in bed...what more could a girl ask for in a rebound?
What is more embarrassing, shitting yourself in Mexico or having sex in a forest preserve with a 19 yr old? This is crucial research.
STOP SENDING ME NAKED PICTURES WHEN I'M TRYING TO TEACH. MONDAY TUESDAY 1-3 IS A DICK AND ARSE FREE ZONE
So you can now add nose to my list of places that cum has gone that it shouldn't...
He took home that trashy slut from Bama but a NFL Lineman was just in my DMs so... who’s the real winner here
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