i have nine cents in my fucking bank account... not even a dime
I wish I could google chicago male strippers on my work computer but I don't feel like talking to HR today
I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.
I'm not embarrassed about the lap dance. I'm embarrassed for the singing during.
Being high is an amazing excuse. I was using him for the potential of a beret, come on. I'd do that sober.
I enjoy it and I rock at it. I wish there were a respectable way to make giving blow jobs a career.
I think you're too young for vagina rejuvenation but I guess you have never been one to listen. Sounds good! You bring the Percocet ill bring the vodka!
It's all a blur. I just remember holding some strangers baby
Yah. Thai people are way too trusting
It's the best! If I had one wish it would be for life to be one really long gay porno. Thats what I wish for during every 11:11.
I currently need breakfast in bed, morning sex, and a bourbon and diet coke. Make this happen
There's Dick Pix, Zorro, and The Little Engine that Could. I nickname my fuck buddies for the exact same reason why you don't name animals which you will one day have for dinner.
the texts you sent will act as the rosetta stone for all drunk people
That's the 2nd med student that has had his tongue in my butthole, what gives.
it's like he didn't even know what a vagina was
I am dancing alone in my bathroom because I was paranoid the neighbors were watching through the windows
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