so he reminded me it was our 9 month anniversary and then said "we could've had a baby by now"
As weird as that was it was probably the best advice i've ever gotten from a tranny
So yes, he's hot, a scorpio, an artist and a perfect cock. I think my bi train just arrived in gay town.
I talked a bachelorette party out of a 4 person bucket of long islands, and drank it by myself. Please call me a taxi. The fat brides maid just grabbed my cock
Sorry I pulled the thermostat off the wall..
He'll choke me during sex but he won't eat a strip of bacon. Vegetarians are weird.
I don't think my body can handle the alcohol I want to put in it anymore.
he pulled a $400 bottle of champagne out of the back part of his toiled and I was ready to blow him then and there
You had your dick do your apologizing for you last night. Apology accepted.
WHEN DID YOU SAY YOU COME BACK BC I GOT INVITED TO A KEG WAR PARTY
my hand froze to the top of can of beer cuz i fell asleep outside. i decided to find a way to open the bottom of the can before addressing my severe frostbite. PRIORITIES!
Should I go sleeveless of strapless?
Hmmm, it doesn't matter. You're gonna be topless by the end of it.
I just saw elmo dancing with gumby. The bars at 7a.m. are AWESOME.
Blueberry probiotics greatly increase to the masturbation experience. Try it dude. It’s all the rage
I'd invite you over to drink but then I wouldn't be drinking by myself.
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