Holy wow, I found all the old poems u wrote me back when we were in looooooooove...just sort of wild to look back on, thought u'd like that
I think tonya harding is in my dwi class!
Ask her how she and Jeff Gillooly split the cats after the divorce.
This girl is more easily done than said...
threw up during christmas carols. the audience at the church seemed to immediately know i was a college student
She went off on a twilight/new moon tangent before we even got back to my room. i had to jump the ship and pretended to pass out on the sidewalk.
had my ear almost bitten off in foreplay. the sex gods do not like me.
Saw my boss's vagina at that party. Hung over at work has never been more acceptable
Sounds like it could have been the night you pulled out your love stump at the strip club.
RE-DICK-YOU-LUSSSSS
That's me emphasizing the ridiculous
Come on down you're the next contestant on "lets go drinking!"
It was everywhere. My dick was a sprinkler of lost future children.
Just had a smooth transition from sexting to buffalo chicken dip 😂😂😂
Your skills amaze me
You chose shitty college football over this pussy and my cute little mouth. That's your fault.
I want to find him again. His Corona tank top and I were made for each other.
That's the 3rd negative pregnancy test this month. I'm on a roll.
Randomize
