Somehow she slept thru the vacuuming, people walking in and out, and the sound of constant beer bottles hitting the trash, but when someone said weed in a regular volume of voice she startled awake.
Yeah we call her cincohandjabos because she gave 5 guys handjobs one night in 5th grade
its fine. mom just made me chug a long island. and made a crying face when i balked. we'll talk tomorrow.
Do you remember Kelly my alter personality? She talked like a man and would sing amazing grace?
I am ina trunk. Iam in a trunnnnnjkk. I hope its yours. Oh manomanomano. Thids better be your trunk
I finally looked at the pictures from last night thanks for feeding me and pulling my pants up
I can't come tonight. Someone took a shit in the dressing room. A.) Clean it up or B.) Kill myself. Text back with your answer.
You had your shirt off checking IDs at the door and you don't even work there
I woke up smelling like chlorine with a broke toe. They know how to fucking party on lake lanier.
I feel like I got ass raped in the brain.
who dressed up as a cop at your party???
idk I have to check. Why?
he gave me the best strip search of my life. FIND HIM.
Hostess is going out of business we'll never survive the apocalypse
I was orgasming and dying of laughter at the same time. I think I've found the One.
ANIME MEN ARE MAKING ME QUESTION MY SEXUALITY AGAIN
Live it up bro, they're always so surprised to find out you use magnums, being such a tiny man and all. It's a good thing.
Fuck this pandemic. She grabbed the hand sanitizer instead of the hand lotion while giving me a hand job and now my dick is burning and scrotum are on fire
A hand job? Are you 12?
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