sorry probably not gonna make it :( kinda tied up right now
sad face, r u gay?... wait like really tied up?
:)
We're pretty sure the 'pocket' aspect of the hot pocket is unnecessary. Testing our theory now.
And when we woke up we made beer pancakes. Great start to a family picture day.
He just "revenge puked" on her kid. I think we'll be leaving soon.
i have this gut feeling friday is going to be interesting.\nAnd by interesting I mean I feel like im going to get punched in the face by his girlfriend.
He did plead exhaustion. And I made him push through it. I am like the motherfucking badass football coach of sex.
almost getting arrested is turning into fucking this cop in his ex wife's lawn. see you tomorrow
They reenacted the scene from the lion king where mufasa talked to simba from the clouds. As high as they were they got it word for word. There has to be an award for that.
He came so hard he burst a blood vessel in his eye. Do I have to take him to the ER? because I'm too tired for this shit.
my roommates tied me up with rope and duct tape then left me outside the door to the hot girls' suite on my floor, knocked on the door and ran away leaving me there with a sign that says free
IDK I WAS CAUGHT UP IN THE TEQUILA SHOTS AND FRIENDSHIP
These are the last few fleeting sober moments of the day for me. If there is anything you need me to do today, please tell me now
This drink tastes like mosquito repellent.
We did blind alcohol taste testing and she got 10 of 10. I'm in love.
Okay so as of now, we may either be coming for one night, two nights, or not at all this weekend. It depends on Laura's toe and if I get my period. Will explain later
Randomize
