weddingsv make me drug and hornr
dude uncooked spaghetti noodles dipped in thousand island dressing is better than it sounds
Drunk roommate walked in on us and asked if we wanted to go eat a sandwich with her in the bathroom.
At least we kept it together. It's people like him who yell at bushes that give acid a bad name
Tell your boss that he's keeping you from eating a fuck sundae off of these 36-24-36 34 D's waiting for you at home on Valentine's Day.
What's standard gratutity for someone having a miscarriage on stage at a strip club? It's important.
He probably has his cowboy hat on, that's his house hat.
The "don't get cum on anything" rule also applies to my furniture and scarves
That's not technology. Doesn't count.
Watching elf, eating a tub of ice cream, and coming to terms with the fact that I haven't had sex in 5 months. Happy fucking holidays.
I mean I just feel if I'm not being fat and lazy then I'm not really being myself
Once you share a nude experience with someone and three Norwegian guys, you're bound for life.
The struggle bus has heated seats and stops at Dunkin on Friday mornings so I'll be okay.
What do you mean? Just eat his food and have sex with him. Unless you want a relationship, then just eat his food.
when you shit yourself on the way to school its time to give up and go home
wyd
Laying here debating on if i want a sandwich or an orgasm.
Randomize
