woke up to find a pram in the balcony. first thing we did was look over the edge!
its mom's weekend..did we need to couger proof the apt?
Just saw your girl from last night... Be embarrassed
Yo. I have a shitload of cardboard. We have to build a smoke hut in the smoke room with a tunnel connected to a cat house. This way the kitty can join us whenever she pleases
Looks like a significant portion of my drinking money just became legal fees.
I was really excited when he said that condoms didn't fit him, then he added "they fall right off"...
I feel miserable and there's nutella all over my phone
The only thought that went through my head was "that would be an absolute disaster" so of course I said yes
Names, who you're caught in bed with, both minor details
I just handed a girl a slice of pizza and she handed me her number. Is this how Vegas hookups normally begin?
Dougie got over his pride nerves. Found him dancing on a float wearing nothing but rainbow boxers.
You should never be more than a quarter of a mile from a working toilet
Preach!
I think you just described to us the most perfect drunken fairy tale that has somehow never been written
3 weeks in a row I've pulled '69' at the deli counter...God is giving me shit for not getting laid in a year....
just realized I'll be in a check out line with just Hershey syrup and condoms. I don't know if I am setting a good image for our generation
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