I think east. Tornado watch. What the fuck are you doing in Texarkana?
Bonnaroo. Tornado watch? Expand on that thought.
Watch for tornadoes.
xbox live and facebook are tricking me into believing I actually have an active social life
Just found out my drug dealer is also a porn star. It's a good day.
I just used my 7th grade year book to figure out who I hooked up with last night. Being home is magical.
Now there are nude photos of that bangin hot Russian spy chick...this is officially the best scandal ever.
I bruised his dick. I bruised his dick WITH MY MOUTH!! I've never felt more accomplished.
That's why you NEVER put anything a stripper gave you in your mouth
I'm doing somethin that's never been done before...the 10 am booty call come over
Girl please we both know I eat his bullshit up like its candy sprinkled with crack
It'd probably just be a lot of profanity and hyperventilation and deteriorating into tears anyways
so just a regular conversation then
He came on my pillow pet. That's unacceptable. I hate boys.
Try eating a sub blackout with your uncle. It's not easy ok
Just put me in your contacts as coyote
Over 14,000 people at my school and the kid I went home with last night is IN MY FUCKING LECTURE
She was drunk at Red Robin. She asked for more fries and then shoved them in her purse while saying "Come on bitches, you're coming with me" to them.
Randomize
